The Easiest People to Love…
…Are ‘there’.
My easiest person to love is Odie.
If you know her, you’ll love her too.
Odie smiles at me in the dark.
I mean in the dark, dark.
Odie is smart, she’s soft-spoken,
She’s wise. She knows everything.
Many years ago, tragedy visited.
It found me hiding in the business that I normally mind.
When I could take no more of it,
And when my cry for help lay asleep in my mouth,
Odie knew.
She stayed and listened as I said
Much of nothing.
My lovely friend sat where I sat and told me I was alright.
I was innocent and had no fault.
She said this before I explained.
And in the hysteria that ensued, my words gathered.
I mustered the remains of my trust
And took her with me back to the events
That had dragged me — and her — to this moment.
Odie.
I forget her birthday more times than I admit.
I always, always remember two days after.
It happens so often that now her birthday has moved
From October 18 to October 20th.
A round figure.
Just as I like it.
And, yes, it’s okay by us both.
We find it funny. Most times.
That’s what friendship is. The very epitome of it.
The way I buy her flowers and say a ‘pretty sorry’,
And she winks at me from her place by the window…
The forgiveness we offer each other.
How I know just what to say,
And she knows just what to do and when.
It’s easy.
She’s easy to love.
Because she’s always right.
She’s always right there.
Odie told me it was not my fault that I got fired.
She said the money I took — without permission —
Was better off in my pocket than company coffers anyways.
I didn’t have to explain to her because she knows me.
She understands. Unlike every other person,
She listens and she understands what I go through. Me.
When the birthdays come and I realize them late
As is my weakness, I apologize and offer flowers
With a ‘pretty please’ by the side.
I open the birthday wine and down three glasses. By myself. Me.
Then I proceed to explain why I forgot this year.
It’s always the same excuse every year anyways: I am busy.
It starts to sound ridiculous by my sixth glass of wine,
And I eventually decide that I am forgiven.
I smile at the flowers, put out the candles
(if I bothered to get any)
And head off to bed.
Why? Because I can. She’s just such a friend.
Odie knows everything as I know it.
Because she’s always there with me.
She lives in a picture frame on my wall,
But she also lives in my memories and in my thoughts.
I miss her every day.
Not a moment goes by that I don’t wonder
Why she, of all people, has to be there.
Indeed, the easiest ones to love
Are the ones who are not here.
Our loved ones who are not with us in body.
They cannot complain. They cannot refuse us forgiveness.
Their ability to misunderstand us is lost
Because we carry them everywhere.
They are everywhere we are.
They cannot ‘not’ know. They don’t have that liberty.
Their absence puts them five steps above those who are here.
Our imagination is quick to tell us what they would’ve said if they were here.
We bend them. We tell them what to tell us
And they tell us obediently because they live rent-free in our minds.
They owe us loyalty for the love we show them.
They are so easy to make lovable.
All the while, we ignore those who are not subject
To our manipulations.
These individuals can refuse us forgiveness
They can reject our offers of flowers and candles.
They can harm us with their words and their ignorance of our problems.
And they do. Repeatedly.
It’s not these people we don’t like.
Not their shortcomings.
The problem is their humanity.
It is their single, most limiting factor.
And the effects of their limitations are
Insurmountable.
It is the main cause of our different opinions.
So why would I pick those who can see and understand the world
Over those who can see and understand Me?
Isn’t that a waste of emotions?
Shouldn’t we love those who are easiest to love first?
And simply tolerate the limitations of all others?
Maybe we should. Maybe the answer to all of the questions above is ‘yes’,
In which case, we better hope all who are with us today
Swiftly pass on to the alternate world.
They should move over there so that they too can be easily loved.
By us.
There’s More for Bisi Amanwi…
